what is schu? The official definition of NCS is:
A worrying, exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere, often triggered by posts seen on social media.
But I don't have to tell you what that definition is, you've all experienced what it's like when your friends are on social media and doing something wrong. Enough for all these jokes, adventures and plans. Feelings are excluded. We have all felt the nagging anxiety of HFS as it destroys our once happy moods with envy and sadness. Even if we received an invitation. Even if we refused to go to this event simply because we didn't want to. Even if we couldn't think of anything worse to do. HCS is not biased. HUD worms its way into your thinking and sets that anxiety up that makes you breathe a little faster. So why are we afraid to miss out? In this article, you will learn more about the causes of NFS and what you can do to deal with it.
Why are we afraid of missing out?
Simply because we are human. We are social creatures and, most importantly, beasts of burden. To be socially included is the instinct of self-preservation. If we were denied our package, we were left to let the elements die so it was biologically programmed in us to want to be turned on and become part of the pack. Since the days of the caveman, our society has progressed dramatically since then. Social exclusion does not mean death, it is death to the ego rather than death. But with the advent of social media, our primal CNS has resurfaced because all we could do to be turned on is shove in the face 24/7. Life is not a party, in the relationship between parties and fun adventures, there is an ordinary, routine life! And while our ordinary, mundane lives can be wonderful, we are still insecure that our lives are not perceived as interesting and this is thanks to social media.
How does NHS affect our lives?
40 years ago, NCS is not a very big problem, because the long-distance communication is not very good. Instead of 500 hundred friends, we have a few friends who were around, and if they were doing something, we had no idea and therefore were not called to feel like a NHS. If someone rubbed it in your face that you weren't there, then we felt left out. But right now, social media is dominating our lives with exciting moments of every reel bombarding our minds. We always make the assumption that everything is much fuller and more exciting than our own.
Information Overload
Thanks to technological advances, we are exposed to huge amounts of information constantly and it's too much for our brains. We cannot say that a person has done what he blurs everything into one and that one person is everything. Everyone is doing all this cool stuff, all the time, 24/7, and you don't. All this information has not consumed us emotionally and mentally and it is exhausting. NCS is a cyclical compulsion that we cannot quit. We are addicted to the point of insanity using social media as a mental disorder, while making ourselves feel bad for HFS and so we will get through more. We are addicted to social media and we are not good at practicing good social media health. As much as I would like to dump the social media giants for creating platforms that are meant to be addictive, we are the ones that open apps, scroll through and feed addictions every day. We are the ones that don't follow bad channels, bad people and negativity. In real life, if someone doesn't bring you happiness and joy, you avoid them and avoid all connection with them. But you still have them as a facebook friend, you have already unfollowed them in real life and not in virtual life, which is even worse in many ways. So, what is the result of this overwhelming information and the lack of proper social assistance from the media? Your mental health is in tatters. HFS is detrimental to our mental health, causing mood swings, loneliness, feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression.((Economy of time: how NFS affects your mental health and should be addressed))
will fill up
You see all these things happening around you and you feel overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things going on without you. There are so many ways to go down and you don't have the time, energy, or resources to do all those things. Even if we did one of them, there will always be 10000 more things that other people do and we feel insignificant.
Fear
In particular, the fear of alienation. You feel excluded and therefore afraid at a basic level, as if you missed this nuance, you will be excluded forever and therefore, fearing for your survival in a social group.
I hate myself
We feel uninteresting, boring and average. Fearing that we would be perceived as boring if we didn't attend all social events, even if we didn't want to go. We instinctively care what people think of us, and we use that information to intimidate ourselves. Makes us feel anxious and depressed, which in turn makes us anxious at social events so we can't have fun.
Is set in comparison thinking
Thinking, comparison is a cancer that destroys your life. We love to compare ourselves to others to find out where we are on the scale of success because we love coming and progressing. It's in our nature. But thinking comparison only leads to our own hatred, because we find the reasons we failed and we intimidate ourselves about it. Do not compare yourself to anyone, because you are not comparable in any way. No one has walked their lives, not even identical twins, and no one has what you have. Instead of hazing yourself for your shortcomings, focus on your blessings and express gratitude for it. Learn more about mentality comparison here: The more we compare, the more we lose ourselves
How to overcome NHS
HSN kills happiness. Comparison is a thief of joy, and when we compare our lives with those on social networks, although we cannot compare, because our lives are so beautifully different. So what can we do to overcome this?
1. Know that social media is not reality
Understand that social media is not reality, there are so many posts of happy funny faces doing something cool and engaging. But that doesn't tell the story of the man who smiles through his teeth, because really, they didn't want to be there.
2. Jomo hugs
Jomo is joy in missing out. When you feel the tugs of comparison and fear, simply remind yourself of your worth and take a moment to show your gratitude for what you are doing right now. What you are doing now is someone else's dream. Practicing gratitude and reminding yourself that just because something else is going on without you doesn't mean they aren't important to you.
3. Reinsurance
Reassuring yourself that just because something is happening doesn't mean your value is affected in any way. NFS is caused by an instinctive fear for survival. The best way to deal with fear is to convince yourself that you are safe and that you are physically, emotionally and psychologically safe. You are still interesting, important and dignified.
4. Ask yourself: "Do you really want to be here?"
Seriously, do you really want to be there? I know that NHS travel is when someone is on a warm beach in Bali, living with beautiful yoga poses, and you feel NDS. But ask yourself, do you really want that life? It's not as great as instagram makes it seem. Also, we give you HNS parties and events that if we were there we would hate. We often just want to be seen doing something so we feel so cool that people will think we're interesting, which leads to.
5. Try not to care what people think of you.
It's not that easy to do, but it's not what people think of you. You shouldn't waste your life trying to get favorable reviews from people who won't show up for your funeral. I wrote in a previous article about how to stop caring what other people think of you here: How to Stop Worrying About What People Think and Focus on Your Needs
6. See the bigger picture
We sit and torment ourselves with all the things we lack for. The reality is that in your entire life, this is the only thing that makes you feel like a grain of sand in the ocean. In less than 24 hours, it won't matter to you at all, so don't let it ruin your day, because in your entire life, it's nothing.
7. Make More Plans
If you're feeling HNS because you're feeling like you're not doing with your life, go and do something. You are the master of your life. If you feel left out, move on to more events with people. Also, if you're an introvert, like me, try a class, learn a new skill, book a ticket, go for a walk, cut your hair. Go and do things while you still can! Life is short, so fill it with adventure!
8. Self service
Check with your emotions more and take better care of yourself. Take time every day to sit and watch the rain with a cup of tea or meditate, sleep, go for a short walk. Spend some time not connected to the internet so that your brain has time to play catch up and the rest. Try some of these 40 in your own care techniques for rejuvenation and restoration of oneself.
9. Clean up your social media
Get rid of anything that makes you feel sad or depressed on social media. Make sure your social media is a place of positivity and happiness. The benefit of social media is you can unfollow people, but don't delete them. This way you can stop listening to their opinion all day long without hurting their feelings.
10. Be happy for other people
If you see someone who is on vacation and you feel HNS, you should not stop them or cast a shadow. Be happy for them. Be grateful for where you are now and the adventures you have had. Be happy for all these people who live amazing fun lives and know that it has nothing to do with you.
Final Thoughts
HMS is the mindset that makes us feel anxious, depressed and, more often than not, bored and uninteresting. But this couldn't be further from the truth. NFS is only going to get bigger and more challenging in our lives going online, so I hope these methods can help you overcome NES more easily.
More tips about mental strength
- The 5-Step Self-Care Guide for Busy People
- How to stop comparing yourself to others and celebrate your uniqueness
- How to turn the fear of missing out into the joy of missing out