Are you struggling to develop new habits?
While it's important to first understand how the habit loop works, you should also start collaborating with an accountability partner.
An accountability partner is someone who works solely to keep us in control and accountable. It may be more than one person who will keep you focused and committed to your goals and make sure you take the right steps towards success.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
- What is an accountability partner?
- Why should you have an accountability partner?
- Qualities of a responsible partner
- Types of Accountability Partners
- How to get started with an accountability partner
- Substance
What is an accountability partner?
An accountability partner can be compared to a partnership where you mutually agree to mentor each other and offer feedback within agreed timelines. Feedback can be shared daily or weekly.
The flow of communication between accountability partners resembles an inspiration session. The main difference is that the communication focuses on two accountability partners rather than a group of individuals.
Here's everything you need to know about developing new habits with an accountability partner.
Why should you have an accountability partner?
Responsibility can be internal or external.
Internal responsibility is synonymous with personal responsibility. However, I will focus on external accountability on this topic.
Working with an accountability partner can help you form new habits.
Naturally, people need to be encouraged to make a concerted effort to achieve their goal. Achieving a goal can become a burden when you are isolated from the group.
Before I cover how you can develop new habits with an accountability partner, here are some of the benefits of working with an accountability partner:
- An accountability partnership gives you the opportunity to mentor someone in forming a habit, and you also get value in return.
- It allows you to get closer to someone who shares your struggles, hopes, dreams, and goals.
- It's easier to meet at a mutually convenient time. There is no need to make an appointment, as is the case with professional coaching.
- Since both accountability partners benefit mutually, you do not pay for coaching.
- The partnership supports your commitment.
So what about mastermind groups? Yes, they can be helpful, but each group member has limited time to share their concerns and ideas. With an accountability partner, the amount of time is unlimited.
An accountability partner can help you build new habits in the following categories:
- Diet or nutrition
- Fitness workout
- Effective communication
- Emotional growth and meditation
- Bringing up children
- Relations
- Budgeting and saving
- Home Organization
- Self-help
- Learning Development
- Writing
Imagine that if you meet with someone at the library every week, then you are laying a good foundation for building a strong accountability partnership.
Learn more about the importance of strong accountability:
Benefits of having a responsible partner
Keep you motivated
Many times during any life mission people lose their motivation. This is nothing to be ashamed of or afraid of - it can happen to anyone, even the best of us. However, the loss of motivation at critical moments of the journey can derail the entire journey. In fact, many people give up completely, and this marks the end of whatever mission they set out to accomplish.
This is where accountability partners come into the discussion. They constantly keep you motivated by helping with their words and actions. It's amazing how much the right words can do to motivate you. Accountability partners don't abandon you when you start to lose motivation; rather, they find how to motivate you again. It's beautiful.
Continuous Improvement
Cultivation is one of the few areas of life where there is no limit. Even after achieving everything you set out to achieve, there is always room for improvement—and accountability partners are always looking for ways you can improve yourself. So, even if what you have done is so brilliant, there is always a way to improve it.
Accountability partners can do this by offering a different perspective on what you have done. They may also simply scrutinize the entire process to identify weaknesses and errors in your work.
Valuable support and advice
If you've ever taken on any project from start to finish, you'll understand why support and advice are such important factors. When I say any project, I mean any project at all. It could even be drawing with crayons at your leisure!
There are typical moments when things go wrong and your thinking becomes hazy. Many people even come close to giving up and letting the whole project explode - I was in that. This point is very delicate, as it can signal the end of a project if not properly controlled.
Sign in, accountability partners. They just never stop advising and supporting you during these difficult times. Knowing that there is someone who constantly expects you to succeed and proves it with their actions is enough to lead you to success.
Please note that this support and advice is not just for when you are depressed. Even after huge wins and breakthroughs, you need someone to celebrate with. You need someone with whom you can be happy. You need accountability partners.
Honest review
Honest feedback is something that is hard to get. Usually people surround themselves with their friends and relatives during a project or program. Often these friends and relatives of yours don't want to hurt your feelings or see you sad, so they hide the whole truth about it.
Let me be honest with you - these people will not help you reach your potential or move to the next level. They will keep you mediocre if you let them "protect" you. Accountability partners, on the other hand, are concerned about your true growth. These partners will give honest feedback about your work, no matter how offensive they may be. This honest feedback can be the difference between failure and success.
Disadvantages of having an accountability partner
Imposing ideas on you
One of the main disadvantages is that accountability partners force their ideas on you. If you are not very persistent, you will find yourself being rocked left and right. Worse still, some people may find that their work loses all originality due to the imposition of the will and ideas of accountability partners.
This does not mean that these partners do it intentionally, as sometimes it can be really unintentional. In any case, assertiveness, firmness and the ability to independently make a final decision are needed.
Quarrels and disagreements can be destructive
Building good relationships with accountability partners is certainly a goal. It may take months or even years, but the result is usually excellent. Many people even develop emotional attachments in the course of working with accountability partners. Although all this looks perfectly normal, there is a problem - possible quarrels and disagreements.
Do not misunderstand me; I'm not saying that there will be quarrels and disagreements - I'm saying what will happen if they happen? Any quarrel or disagreement can mean not only the end of the relationship, but the end of the entire project.
Qualities of a responsible partner
Finding the right accounting partner is just as important as having one. It is important to note that you do not need someone who is going to break you, as this will make things worse.
If you're wondering how to find the right person to keep you in check, here are some things you should look for in an accountability partner.
1. Disciplined
Discipline is an important quality that everyone should possess, and accountability partners are not excluded. You must make sure that the people you surround yourself with as partners are disciplined, because indiscipline in their path can negatively affect you.
There are times when we feel overwhelmed and need motivation. If your partner can offer you this desire to nurture you, he is right for you and your partnership will flourish. They can pull you out of stress and put you back on the right track with some discussion and some motivation.
Working with an accountability partner who can motivate you will also help you avoid procrastination when it's time to take action towards your goals.
2. Ambitious
Accountability partners should not be content with mediocrity. They always want to see you improve and move to the next level. They encourage you to work harder when you start to slack off and fall behind.
It is always important to know your limits and move forward. If you and your accountability partner share the same ideology, it will greatly benefit both of you.
However, it is very important not to overdo it, as this can harm you. Knowing where you stand and using your accountability partnership as the basis for improvement is the best move.
3. Patient
An accountability partner must be patient with you. They don't jump to conclusions and don't rush you into making decisions. They understand, even in an emergency, how patience can help you make better decisions.
Another important feature of an accountability partner is its openness to constant and frequent discussions. Your partner must be able to provide you with regular or weekly feedback and have enough time and dedication to do so.
Having an accountability partner who gives you feedback after a few months is like not having a partner at all. In addition, it is important to have ongoing accountability for every major decision you make.
4. Supportive
Support - of course, of course. Oprah Winfrey once described Maya Angelou as "always with me." Any good accountability partner should always be there for support and words of encouragement.
This is an important trait that you should look for in your partner, as it is very important to have someone who wants the very best for you. Their intentions must be pure and directed to your benefit.
If the person in your partnership does not have the best of intentions, then your partnership will be negative and will only move you further away from your goal. It's worse than not having a partner at all. Make sure you find someone who will make you better and more successful.
5. Capable of giving constructive criticism
Today this part is often neglected. An accountability partner should be able to provide honest feedback and constructive criticism. Pay attention to the word "constructive". This means that they must know how to criticize without putting down the person in question.
An accountability partner with extensive experience can help you make decisions. They can tell from experience whether a particular business idea will succeed or whether a new diet is feasible.
Having such a person in your corner can be the reason for your success. You can take advantage of their experience and use it in your story to achieve anything.
Types of Accountability Partners
Now that you know the basics of what an accountability partner is, it's also important to know the different types of partners you can choose from. This gives you the freedom to find someone who will match your preferences or specific goals.
Professional Advisor
A professional is always a great way to find guidance in any field. They have a wealth of experience that you can use to make your dreams come true. They know how to help you find a balance between your desires and needs, and between your emotions and your logic.
Senior who had a similar journey
It can be great to have someone who has gone through a similar experience that you are going through right now, as they can give you the right advice to succeed. This person does not have to be older than you; it could be someone younger who just has more experience in a certain area.
Colleague
This is another great idea for an accountability partner, as a colleague or colleague is on the same career path as you and may have similar interests. If someone provides neutral feedback, it will help you build your career effectively and perform better.
Friend or family member
Someone close to you will always cherish your interests and have a genuine interest in your success, making them a great choice as your accountability partner. Their advice and feedback will always be for your own good. Just make sure it's someone who's willing to be completely honest, even if it may make you temporarily uncomfortable.
How to get started with an accountability partner
Your goal now is to find someone who shares the same passion and commitment to forming new habits. Make a list of potential people you trust and let them know about your intention. The list should include people you value highly.
As a tip, exclude your close friends so the partnership doesn't end in chatter. Every moment must be considered and deliberate. The point of a relationship is to give honest feedback and not waste time.
So if you are ready to work with an accountability partner, consider the following:
- Is the outlook reliable? Can you expect the person to follow your recommendations and respect them?
- Can he or she have difficult conversations? Can you provide direct feedback without resorting to unnecessary excuses or defenses?
- Does this person have a larger vision of their life? Do they have aspirations that you resonate with?
- Is this person ready to take action? Do they have a sense of commitment and are they ready to move beyond the status quo?
It may also be necessary to introspect and be sincere with yourself. If you haven't been loyal, honest, and reliable in the past, admit it.
You don't have to fool yourself; try to come to terms with your present reality and your future aspirations. This will allow you to focus on how your partner can succeed as you cannot give what you lack.
Here are five steps to find an accountability partner:
Step 1: Find the right person
Where you look determines who you meet. You can search online or in person. You can also attend local meetings, TedxSessions, or reach out to serious friends who also need an accountability partner.
Examples of platforms and tools you can use:
- Forums, websites, blogs about the habits you want to form.
- Facebook groups (enter habits to search for groups around them).
- Applications for accountability.
- Local events and group meetings.
- Seminars and master classes.
It will be easier for you to partner with the right leads once you decide to work with an accountability partner.
Step 2: Be open to potential clients from another world
Work with someone with the same level of achievement but dynamic strengths and weaknesses that are different from yours.
For example, healthy eating and exercise contribute greatly to physical development. If you have mastered the habit of eating healthy but need motivation to exercise regularly, you can find a partner who has learned to exercise but lacks healthy food. Both of you will complement each other, and the result will be wonderful.
Finding someone who is above your level of success will challenge you and also establish a synergistic accountability relationship rather than a coaching arrangement. Both of you will appreciate every moment together, and the formation of new habits will become easier.
Step 3: Meet Your Preferred Candidate
Once you have settled on any of the prospects on the list, ask the person if he or she is interested in forming new habits through an accountability partnership. Explain what it is, how it works, and highlight the benefits of a relationship.
If neither of you has any doubts about becoming an accountability partner, hang out for a while and decide that you knew each other.
Step 4: Choose a day and time, as well as a form of meeting
You can structure the meeting in different ways. This can be by phone, via Skype, in person, or you can share updates via email, social media platforms, or text. The medium you use is less important as long as you communicate and offer mutual accountability.
For accountability purposes, you can choose a time and date that works for both parties.
In addition, it is extremely important to keep a consistent schedule. Both parties must compare their weekly activities and find the right time to reach agreement.
There is no doubt that you will have to reschedule the meeting, but it is extremely important to set a constant time integrated into the week. Each time you meet at a certain time, your mind can relive ideas and issues that need attention, which you can fix by the next meeting.
Step 5: Compile a weekly accountability report
The last action item is to create what I call a "statement of responsibility". These are actionable steps that both of you can take before you meet again. They are like milestones, which are small actions that are part of a larger goal.
The abbreviation VDYAV means:
- B - Opportunity
- D - Action
- I am Clarity
- B - Time limit
Let's look at four elements.
B - Opportunity
Are the milestones in the accountability statement achievable?
While thinking big is a great idea, your goal must be achievable so that it can be completed within the time frame.
If you want to write a habit-forming guide, like "I'll write 3000 words next week," is perfectly achievable if you can write 1000 words a day.
D - Action
Can you act on the target?
I have seen several people who set themselves goals that exceeded their capabilities.
For example, "I'll write more Kindle books next month" is not feasible because it lacks clear steps.
This is the best statement of responsibility: “I will write 20 e-books for Kindle on habit formation by hiring 20 ghostwriters next month.”
This statement is not only specific; it sets out what you need to do to reach your goal.
I am Clarity
Your statement of responsibility should bring clarity to the fore. It must exclude reasons why the goal cannot be achieved. It should be clear and concise.
For example, "I'll write 3000 words next week" is better than "I'll write 3000 words if I don't have visitors next week."
You must consider potential obstacles when drafting your accountability statement. If you have visitors next week, the ideal replacement would be "I'll hire a ghostwriter to write 3000 words next week."
B - Time limit
You must set clear deadlines for each commitment. The next meeting will be the deadline. However, if you both feel like there will be a long break before the next meeting, you can arrange to chat online or share the results online.
Conclusions
You can't overstate the benefits of working with an accountability partner when it comes to forming a new habit.
Just make sure you follow the five steps highlighted above so that both of you can maximize your relationship.
Focus on the problem you are both facing and offer the other partner honest feedback, and use the DOCUMENT formula to create an accountability statement.
You will form new habits if you can break down your main goal into steps. And more importantly, two good heads are better than one. You can achieve your most important goals through partnerships of accountability rather than by isolating yourself.